Professor Sarah Trenholm and Interpersonal Communication
Professor Sarah Trenholm was my first college professor back in '91 at Ithaca College. She was and is a speech communications professor, and her specialty (of which she has written books) is interpersonal communication. I vividly remember one of our first lessons that semester.
Professor Trenholm, who I liked very much, taught us about the power of eye contact. She taught us that eye contact was one of the first and most important forms of communication, even when it came to crossing someone's path and looking into their eyes. By performing that simple task, you are actually "communicating" with the other person. So, imagine how many people we actually communicate with. Since that time, in particular, I have made it a habit to look into people's eyes.
It didn't hurt my parents always impressed upon me the importance of making good eye contact with people when you speak to do them. Otherwise, it could be discerned you are lying, hiding something, have a problem et al. I admit this is a problem for many people.
Often, eye contact is very difficult for many of us. It is hard to look someone in the eye, especially when you have something difficult to tell them. In fact, as far as I am concerned, this world has become more IMpersonal (no pun intended) since my class back in '91. We can now use the internet and other means to mask our eyes, our emotions and our very souls. Indeed, we really don't have to look at anyone anymore to get a point across. We can e-mail them, text message them, IM them, etc.
But, how do things still hold up when we get "out there" in the real world? Can we still look someone in the eyes and communicate with them? Is it still interpersonal communication when we cross eyes with someone in our path, or someone sitting next to us, in front of us, around us and so on? I think so.
I do think it's increasingly important to maintain eye contact with those around us -- not to freak them out or anything like that -- but to maintain a degree of honesty. At the end of the day, it's still hard for many of us to lie straight to someone's face. That's why Professor Trenholm's lesson on eye contact and interpersonal communication resounds in my mind until this very day -- nearly 15 years after the fact.
Professor Trenholm, who I liked very much, taught us about the power of eye contact. She taught us that eye contact was one of the first and most important forms of communication, even when it came to crossing someone's path and looking into their eyes. By performing that simple task, you are actually "communicating" with the other person. So, imagine how many people we actually communicate with. Since that time, in particular, I have made it a habit to look into people's eyes.
It didn't hurt my parents always impressed upon me the importance of making good eye contact with people when you speak to do them. Otherwise, it could be discerned you are lying, hiding something, have a problem et al. I admit this is a problem for many people.
Often, eye contact is very difficult for many of us. It is hard to look someone in the eye, especially when you have something difficult to tell them. In fact, as far as I am concerned, this world has become more IMpersonal (no pun intended) since my class back in '91. We can now use the internet and other means to mask our eyes, our emotions and our very souls. Indeed, we really don't have to look at anyone anymore to get a point across. We can e-mail them, text message them, IM them, etc.
But, how do things still hold up when we get "out there" in the real world? Can we still look someone in the eyes and communicate with them? Is it still interpersonal communication when we cross eyes with someone in our path, or someone sitting next to us, in front of us, around us and so on? I think so.
I do think it's increasingly important to maintain eye contact with those around us -- not to freak them out or anything like that -- but to maintain a degree of honesty. At the end of the day, it's still hard for many of us to lie straight to someone's face. That's why Professor Trenholm's lesson on eye contact and interpersonal communication resounds in my mind until this very day -- nearly 15 years after the fact.
