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6:30 a.m. at the Gym

CONCEPT
My doctor recently suggested I hire a personal trainer. I was a bit adverse at first, but then he started rattling off a bunch of logical reasons so I gave in. It's not like I am in horrible shape. It's just that I don't have a six pack and bulging muscles like Schwarzenegger used to have. Honestly, it's unlikely I'll ever be the bodybuilding type, but it would be nice to get a notice every once in a while. I've always wanted to be that dude who can eat anything he wants without looking and worse for the wear. I am sure you can relate to this obscene concept. It's one of those body conscience pieces I write every so often.
ALL PAIN, LITTLE GAIN
When Trainer called me to say he could fit me into his morning schedule, I was thinking 8 o'clock would be the perfect beginning to my day. When he told me he'd see me at 6:30 on Thursdays and 6:00 on Fridays, I really had no option but to say yes. After all, the Doc had laid a guilt trip on me, and I knew this was my destiny. So, I started this morning. Trainer is pretty nice, not "juiced" like other trainers I have seen, and really patient with a lump of clay like me. We did some stretching exercises using muscles I never knew existed until they burned like Holy Hell. We also did some push-ups (which, to me, are popsicles that were made popular in the 50s), crunches, more push-ups and other stuff on this gross old gym mat. I also ran the treadmill, which was the easiest part of my morning. Cardio = no problem. The rest = death. I know it is supposed to take time for our bodies to adjust to the new "trauma" inflicted upon it. But, come on man, this is friggin' painful. Pain is cool in some situations, but not at my gym at 6:45 in the morning with Trainer probably laughing in his head about the fact I can only muster 30 push-ups broken into sets of two. Hell, I was surprised I could even do one. But, he reassured me that this thing would get easier and I have to trust him if I am going to shell out serious money for his services. But, damn --- I am in pain.

REWARDS

At the end of the day, no matter how much I complain about the pain, it feels damn good. I am extremely pissed off these days at everyone and everything, so taking it out at the gym seems reasonable. Trainer is a guy who understands why I am pissed at the World, and I was explicit when I told him his only job was to make me into a lean mean M-F'er. I told him I want my bite to equal my bark. I don't even know for sure why I was saying these things. I do know I meant them. My reward, as I see it, will be the day someone says to me, "What happened to you?"

And my reply will be, "Nothing. Nothing at all. Maybe something happened to you."

Coming from someone who is training to be a personal trainer:

Yeah you!! Wooo hooo!!

Yeah it hurts, but it is the good kind of hurt. And you will feel better. Of course as soon as it stops hurting you get to do new things that hurt in other places.

The secret to eating whatever you want and not having to see the consequences - cardio and weights. cardio and weights. cardio and weights. every pound of muscle burns 50 cals a day and every pound of fat burns about 10. So the more muscle you have - the more you can eat :)

I eat about twice as much as some of my girlfriends who have a good 40 pounds on me. You will get there I promise :)

You're going to look awesome! I hate going to the gym too but the end reward is worth it.

6. o. clock. IN THE MORNING?!! You are a better man than I!

I loved the pushup's comparison, though it made me hungry for a dreamsicle at 12:16. IN. THE. MORNING.

You see why those dawn workouts aren't my cup o' tea.

(though they should be.)

oh honey, i feel your pain. yes, it feels good but it sucks like nothing else...

congrats on your willpower. takes balls to get up and do it. particularly when you're tires and pissed.

Bravo. I wish I had half of your motivation.

Did having the personal trainer make you feel like you HAD to do it or you'd let him down?

Keep us informed.. and I suggest a before and after photo comparison. It'll further inspire you :)

If only I can afford a HOT personal trainer...

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About me

  • I'm Nigel Vossap
  • From Cleveland, Ohio

  • I am Ike, a ten-year-old Rottweiler who just relocated to South Florida with my trusty owner, Eric. Together, the two of us are soaking in the sun and chasing some of the finest .... well, you know.

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