Strange Places Strange Faces

If there's anything in the world you want to avoid at all costs more than anything else, it's Ike Farts. Ike Farts are the equivalent of bombing Hiroshima. In fact, he doesn't just clear a room, he clears a whole house. Then, he's so proud of himself that he usually sticks his nose back there to smell the damage. Meanwhile, I am putting a wet towel over my face as if to protect myself from pepper spray. I think you guys get the picture.

So, it will come as no surprise to you that the damn dog, who I love more than anything in the world, put me in the most compromising position today. You see, I had to take him to the vet for some bullshit stuff, and I found myself alone in t he waiting room with this really pretty young girl and her cat. The waiting room has two sides, one for cats and one for dogs, but she was on our side anyway. I wasn't sitting down but a few minutes when Ike's stomach roared, and his ass went into action. The SBD (silent but deadly) had been launched. It was nauseating. I didn't know what to do. Fearing the girl would think it was me, I couldn't take any chances.

"Awwww, Ike," I moaned, emphasizing my displeasure with him. "Let's go outside."

By this point, I hope the girl will realize it wasn't me. I take Ike outside and he promptly, matter-of-factly does his business.

When we walk back inside, the girl looks at me as if to shame me. She takes her kitty box and walks to the kitty side of the waiting area. I am completely humiliated, and good old Ike couldn't care less.

Posted by Ike on Monday, August 21, 2006 at 11:14 PM | Permalink