How a Funeral Can (Re)Define Someone
I've been to plenty of funerals in my time, and sadly I had to go to one today. My Uncle's father-in-law, "Sonny O.", died. Let me be the first to say it was sad. He was too young to die, and cancer killed him. His diagnosis was only about six to eight weeks before his death, leaving family, friends and -- most importantly -- him time to deal with the reality of the whole thing. Today was a time to laugh and cry, love and learn, speak and hear, touch and be touched, and just about every other appropriate cliche I could throw on board right about here.
Now, let's get down to the heart of the matter. How many times do you go to a funeral and the clergy member or person giving the sermon says, "Schmuck. We were happy to see him go."? Never happens. People may think it, but it is never said. Heck, I've been to many funerals where there is no love lost. So, along comes "Sonny O," a stand-up guy if ever there has been one. He is blessed with a beautiful wife, whom he shared 52 years of his life with; He has four amazing children who played starring roles in his life in different ways; he has grandchildren who would make him light up whenever he entered the room -- kids he truly had reason to and loved to dote upon.
No one would ever think of saying, "Schmuck. We were happy to see him go." This is a man who gave back to his country and his community. He liked to golf with his buddies. The people at this funeral today were welled up because we all lost a good one. And, perhaps the saddest (and most amazing) part about the whole thing is that he created a family of absolute love. He left a family without any pettiness, any fights, any bickering, any resentment, et al. He left them more firm than he created them. Cousins, aunts, uncles, sisters, brothers, nieces, nephews. At todays' ceremony, you knew they were all together for Sonny. You knew what they were thinking. They were all on the same page. They all loved this man so much.
On his death bed, he wished for four simple things from his children. He asked that they all get along; he asked that they take care of their mother (indicative of his love for her and their life together); he asked that a man get paid for providing the simplest of services (indicative of how strong, proud and honorable he was until the very end); and he asked that a certain friend handle his final arrangements. These four things. Nothing more. Nothing less. YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY? Because, in the end, Sonny's house was clean. There were no more mountains left to climb. There were no tasks to be completed. His life was fulfilled, and those four kids could rest in knowing it the rest of their lives.
So, that is my ode to Sonny O.
(You'll have to wait for those contest details tomorrow.)
Now, let's get down to the heart of the matter. How many times do you go to a funeral and the clergy member or person giving the sermon says, "Schmuck. We were happy to see him go."? Never happens. People may think it, but it is never said. Heck, I've been to many funerals where there is no love lost. So, along comes "Sonny O," a stand-up guy if ever there has been one. He is blessed with a beautiful wife, whom he shared 52 years of his life with; He has four amazing children who played starring roles in his life in different ways; he has grandchildren who would make him light up whenever he entered the room -- kids he truly had reason to and loved to dote upon.
No one would ever think of saying, "Schmuck. We were happy to see him go." This is a man who gave back to his country and his community. He liked to golf with his buddies. The people at this funeral today were welled up because we all lost a good one. And, perhaps the saddest (and most amazing) part about the whole thing is that he created a family of absolute love. He left a family without any pettiness, any fights, any bickering, any resentment, et al. He left them more firm than he created them. Cousins, aunts, uncles, sisters, brothers, nieces, nephews. At todays' ceremony, you knew they were all together for Sonny. You knew what they were thinking. They were all on the same page. They all loved this man so much.
On his death bed, he wished for four simple things from his children. He asked that they all get along; he asked that they take care of their mother (indicative of his love for her and their life together); he asked that a man get paid for providing the simplest of services (indicative of how strong, proud and honorable he was until the very end); and he asked that a certain friend handle his final arrangements. These four things. Nothing more. Nothing less. YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY? Because, in the end, Sonny's house was clean. There were no more mountains left to climb. There were no tasks to be completed. His life was fulfilled, and those four kids could rest in knowing it the rest of their lives.
So, that is my ode to Sonny O.
(You'll have to wait for those contest details tomorrow.)
Great blog!!
Posted by
chloe |
7:54 PM